Undercover Horror (1/1) Author: Denise Schoppe Email: thistown99@hotmail.com Spoilers: Emily Keywords: Humor (Well I tried.), MSR (maybe a little) Rating: G Archive: Anywhere as long as my name & e-mail addey are attached Summary: Scully goes undercover. . . as a third grade teacher. Disclaimer: Dana Scully and Fox Mulder are the property of Chris Carter, 20th Century Fox and 1013 Productions. The characters have been used without permission for purely non-profit entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. Author Notes: I am writing this following my own experience as a student teacher for a day in a third grade class. Some of the things I mention really did happen to me. ======================== "I'll see you tomorrow." I release a sigh of relief. The last child has left the room. 3:30 and I am headed home. Exhaustion seeps into my bones. I love kids. Don't get me wrong, but I am NOT an elementary school teacher. I am an FBI Agent. I am a doctor. I have taught before, but not third graders. The room looks a bit trashed. I guess I should clean it up a bit. I take it back. Leave it. It'll be here in the morning - unfortunately. As I walk out to my car I smile at other teachers, wave at my students, and nod to parents. As I approach my car a voice comes from behind me. "Enjoy your first day?" I turn to see a smiling teacher behind me. "OH yes. I'm just a bit tired. I can't wait to go home a take a long hot bubble bath." "Oh I know the feeling. Hey get your husband to cook supper. It always makes me feel better." Before I can correct her about my marital status she is in her car. She waves and drives off. Oh Lordy. I get in my car just as my cell phone rings. I glare at it, pick it up hit the send button. "Hey Sc-" I shut to power off. I'm NOT in the mood Mulder. ============= On the drive home I think back to the day Mulder told me the news. "Why do I have to be the teacher. Why can't you do it?" "I'd scare the kids." "No you wouldn't. I've seen you with kids. You are good with them. Remember how you were with Emily?" "That was different." He was right. I sigh at the memory. "Besides, you've taught before." "Yeah, but not. . . children. Little children, I mean. Yes, I've taught grown children, but. . . that's different." "No it isn't. Just remember you can't use any of those scientific terms you love so much." I glared at him. I was running out of excuses. "Why can't I be a counselor or a principal or a secretary? Why a teacher?" "Has to be a teacher. A teacher is closer to the students and more likely to catch anything strange. What do you have against being a teacher?" "Nothing, really. It just isn't me. I don't think I have that mentality. It takes something special to be a teacher." "You're special." ============== Oh no. That is NOT Mulder's car parked over there. He didn't. Please tell me I'm seeing things -- that I am losing my mind. After only the first day of teaching. As I approach the door to my apartment I know. He did and I haven't totally lost it yet. You know, some would say that I am lucky and someone special to have Fox Mulder as such a close friend. Sometime I think it is a curse though. I open my door to my apartment and to find a way too chipper Mulder sitting on my couch. "Mulderrrr-" "Hey teacher! Hey I brought you an apple." He tosses me an apple. I have to drop my briefcase on the floor to catch the apple. He's fighting a grin, as he looks me up and down. I look at myself in the full-length mirror next to the door. There is Elmer's glue in my hair, a "Your GREAT!" sticker on my jacket, I have smeared make-up, and a long run in my hose. He not only begins to smile, but to chuckle too. "Mulder. I'm warning you. I am NOT in the mood." "I know. I know. I'm sorry. I was just thinking that you remind me of my third grade teacher Mrs. Grumpsky." "Mrs. Grumpsky?" "Well that wasn't her real name. It was a nickname. We didn't like her all that much." "Oh thanks you made me feel much better." "Oh Scully. I didn't mean it like that. I'm also thinking that if Mrs. Grumpsky looked like you, well, I'd have sent myself back to third grade over and over again." "Mmmm. Hmmm.. And just what about me reminds you of her?" "Oh it's the glue." The doorbell rings behind me just before I can throw the apple I had been holding at Mulder. He leaps from his seat and runs towards me and the door. "Supper is here." "Supper?" "Yeah. Pizza. Hope you like it." "Well, it's only 4:15, but I am hungry." He nods as he reaches for the doorknob. I go to my bedroom and grab something comfortable to wear. As I head to the bathroom, I hear Mulder in my kitchen getting plates and glasses. I return a few moments later, glue free and comfortable. I feel extremely under dressed next to Mulder's suit from the office even though he has long since shed the tie and jacket. I don't care. My sweats and T-shirt feel so good I can't feel bad long. "Hear ya go, teach." I smile at Mulder as he hands me my plate of pizza and glass of soda. I head to the living room. Mulder joins me and we eat in silence. This is nice. Relaxing. "Feeling better?" I jump at Mulder's voice. It's like he'd been reading my mind. "Yeah. Much." "So tell me about your day." He listens intently as she talks about art projects "glue and macaroni. Why do all elementary school projects consist of the these two objects?", math tests "I'm way to dependent on a calculator.", and a pet rooster named Henny. "Henny? A ROOSTER?" "Yeah." He sakes his head in disbelief. "Anyway, I don't see anything strange going on. I think they are wasting our time on this case." "Maybe." "Mulder, what am I even looking for?" "I'm not real sure, but. . ." "Mulder I really think you should be doing this. You have an ability to find these things faster than me." "Uh yeah. Well, uh. That's what I wanted to talk to you about tonight. I, uh, am going undercover with you. Starting tomorrow, I uh.." "Mulder? Spit it out." "I, uh, The school, uh." "The school what?" "The school has a new principal." FINISHED Undercover Horror... or Fun (1/1) Author: Denise Schoppe Email: thistown99@hotmail.com Spoilers: Arcadia, Anasazi Keywords: Humor (Well I tried.) Rating: G Archive: Anywhere as long as my name & e-mail addey are attached Summary: Mulder and Scully go undercover in an elementary school. Mulder POV this time. Disclaimer: Dana Scully and Fox Mulder are the property of Chris Carter, 20th Century Fox and 1013 Productions. The characters have been used without permission for purely non-profit entertainment purposes only. No copyright infringement is intended. Author Notes: This is a sequel to "Undercover Horror" that I posted on May 8. I had so many requests for another one that I was compelled to continue the story. You don't have to have read the other story to understand this one, nor do you have to read this one to understand that one. Although reading both will make each one more fun. I hope you enjoy it. ===================== I can't believe I made it here alive. Last night, when I told Scully I was to be principal in this undercover case, I though she might pull her gun out and shoot me again. It's not my fault Skinner though two new teachers would be too suspicious. I haven't seen her today. The secretary is supposed to take me around to meet all the teachers later. Miss Fox. I can't believe she chose that as her name. She said she wanted to pick her own name. Miss FOX?!? "Well, Mulder, they didn't exactly give me a lot of time to think about it," she said when I found out her undercover name. "Your name was on the sheet of paper and it was the first thing I could think of." Unfortunately, part of our agreement was that in the next undercover case she got to pick BOTH of our names. Mr. Gray. Very funny, Scully. "You would prefer Mr. Spooky? Besides, with your fascination with Grays that I though that, well, if the shoe fits." It fits like a glove, too. I should do this for a living. If I'd known that being an elementary school principal was so easy, I guess I'd never have agreed to do this. I can't investigate too freely from in here. These four walls tell me nothing. I bored! So here I sit, feet on the desk throwing pencils at the ceiling. I'd go bug Scully if I knew where her room is. "Mr. Gray?" "Uh yes?" My secretary really needs to learn how to knock. "Miss Fox sent a student down to see you." "Miss Fox? Oh OK. Send him in." "Jeffery? Go right in." The kid in front of me seems normal. He must be a suspect if Scully sent him in here. "Hello... Jeffery is it? Why did Miss Fox send you down here?" "I don't know." "You don't know? Certainly she didn't send you down here for no reason whatsoever." "I don't know." Even my psychology training hasn't prepared me for this one. How can I get this kid to talk to me? "Mr. Gray?" When did she come in here? I need to put a bell on that secretary. "Yes?" "Miss Fox sent a note with him saying she'd be down here in a little while to discuss this boys punishment for what he has done." "Did she say what he did?" "No." Great. Thanks Scully. "OK. Thank you. Send her in as soon as she arrives." I turn back to the boy sitting in front of me. His spiky hair and curious, yet challenging, expression only add to my frustration with the situation. "You can't just go around causing problems for everyone." "Why?" "It makes people's days more complicated then they already are." "Why?" "If you help things go smoothly, everyone is happier." "Why?" "It's a fact of life." "Why?" "Well there are these people who live very complicated lives. They claim that it is for the good of all the people. Instead, they just cause tension and so to balance out their tension, people like you have to make life simpler for all." "Why?" "I don't know. It sounded good didn't it?" "Not really." "Oh. Well, why did you do that caused Miss Fox to send you to me." "I don't know." "You're doing it again." "Doing what?" "Making life complicated." "I'm sorry." "It's all right." We sit and stare at each other. Before long we have an intense staring contest underway. Neither of us willing to break the gaze first. We both jump when there is a knock at the door. "Yes?" Scully walks through the door. "Miss Fox, why did you send Jeffery down here? He won't tell me." "I find that hard to believe." "Excuse me?" "You haven't figured out why he is here?" I stare at Scully. Not her too. If I don't get a straight answer soon, I might scream. A girlie scream, at that. "Jeffery, would you please go sit outside. I need to discuss this situation with Miss Fox." The kid shrugs and walks out the door. I turn to Scully who has moved to take the seat Jeffery vacated. "Scully, what is this about? Does this have to do with the case?" "No." "What then?" "I don't know." "You don't know?! You can't just send a kid to the principal's office for no reason." "Why?" "That's a rule." "Whose rule?" "My rule." "Why?" "Because I am the principal." "Why?" "Because Skinner said so." "Why?" "Because - oh wait. I know why you sent him down here." Scully begins to smile. "He only gives one or two word responses to anything and everything. Either that or he won't give a straight answer." "You get a `You're GREAT' sticker, Mulder." FINISHED Well was it pretty good? I absolutely LOVE feedback. I hope it was semi-funny. I tried. The idea had me chuckling all day at school today. I hope my thoughts came across OK on paper.